cult(ure) of safety

Welcome to your adult years, please come in.

Have you healed your inner child yet? If not, don't worry, you can start your healing any time. We won't judge you, you're safe here. Take up all the space you need.

Your inner child, like your nervous system, is as fragile as it sounds. Do you feel that tension in your shoulders? Do you feel the tightness in your chest? That's your nervous system telling you something. Are you listening?

We may sound exactly the same, but don't get it twisted – we are all unique. This is why we look deep into ourselves to understand where our pain comes from, our very own cocktail of traumas. We like to think about our parents here. We also accept immigration stories, as long as you remain obsessed with the country you came from. You may have little to do with your family or your country any more, but you must remain fully preoccupied with them. Don't get too involved with what's around you. Don't let your thoughts wander away.

This is your healing journey, in other words, dissecting your generational trauma to explain your human shortcomings. Never doubt this explanation. You inherited your trauma from others, and what may seem timid, stubborn, closed-minded or egocentric in you, is actually other peoples' pain. If you develop any self-awareness, it should be about how much you carry others' pain. Let it go.

You may meet other people who have not yet done the work. You'll recognize them by how much anxiety they give you. Their unpredictable behaviour will be overwhelming. They will lack that consistent, light and gentle presence that your nervous system just craves and can't cope without. If things get too intense, just hold space for their emotions, without of course, filling that space with anything of your own.

You may be curious what to use to hold space. You will use your boundaries, of course. Your boundaries are the walls that keep you outside their drama, to preserve your peace while you focus on your goals. Those without boundaries simply do not know their worth. These people will not be high value.

Remember and remind others, you can only do the work by yourself. If anyone gets too close, stop them! But also keep them around. As you're holding space, you should share our informational material with them, we have lots of it online.